* * * Mr. Earl P. Watkin, our diligent, hard-working superintendent, under whose leadership the Ilion school system has gained the reputation of being one of the most outstanding in the state, is a star bowler, we hear. Every Saturday morning he can be found in Mohawk, bounding balls with astounding accuracy, in the company of other superintendents and members of the Board of Education. We wonder when he finds time to read poetry!

* * * G Man No. 1 and The Great Mediator might be two titles we could ascribe to our understanding principal, Mr. John Guy Prindle. Not content with winning athletic laurels in Williams, his alma mater, he is now a golfer of note and a member of the illustrious faculty bowling team. In addition to these more apparent joys, 'tis whispered that when spring assaults our winter-wearied souls, he longs for "the old fishin' hole." But we hear that perhaps bridge will conquer in the end.

* * * There's so much to say about Mr. Joseph Baker that we need room to expand. Vice-Principal, vocational adviser, program arranger par-excellence, math teacher, junior adviser, member of the Board of Regents, summer scholar, fond father-these are a few of the jobs assigned to his care. He also "bowls 'em over" in the Capitol alleys. And we must warn all unsuspecting victims that when you are within a radius of three feet, beware of his riddles and jokes, which he springs with no preliminary chuckles or eye-twinklings!

* * * Who would suspect that our dignified business executive of book store fame, Mr. George Fryer, plays merry tunes on the clarinet

* * * or that "Prof" Bemis wields a trombone as well as a football. And did you know that a Boston newspaper once named him "the best softball pitching Prospect in Boston"?!

* * * To mention few of the feminine members of our faculty, Miss Genevieve Ruby and Miss Nora Kinney, who prepare Ilion's future secretaries, are the proud occupants of a brand new apartment, where 'tis said luscious steaks are cooked.

* * * Clare Wasmer, our faculty songbird, who keeps herself busy dividing all Gaul into three parts, has aspirations to take courses at the U. of Mexico (and learn the rumba on the side).

* * * Mrs. Erva Hildebrandt and Mrs. W. Marston are the members of our faculty who specialize in the domestic arts as well as in their professions. And Mrs. Marston has the distinction of being delivered to school parcel post!

* * * Our little librarian, Miss Myra Thompson, although she was homesick for her native California, was an ardent sports enthusiast last winter, excelling particularly in skiing. Taking after her ancestor, Daniel Boon, she loves to explore, whether it be an old attic or a South Sea isle.

* * * To Miss Vera Donnelly, whose entries in the state poster contests always walk off with the prizes, we want to hand a big bouquet. What would class advisers do when May rolls around and the gym must be transformed if it weren't for her help so willingly given? We hope you'll win those Capitol sweep-stakes some lucky Wednesday night!

* * * While we are congratulating, let's not forget what a grand trouper, not to mention actress, we found Miss Bessie Van Deveer in the faculty play.

* * * All of which reminds us that Mr. Burnham, dashing hero of many of our productions, amazes us by having piscatorial interests. After a hard day of mechanical drawing and industrial arts, he finds sympathy and understanding in his aquarium!

* * * Not content with the honor of being often called upon to address various clubs on books of the day, Mr. Arthur D. Bates is our supreme authority on "what the well, dressed young man will wear." Fashion note Feather flowers to match the day in the week are all the rage!

* * * Somewhere among the faculty we knew we'd find a bridge expert, yet it seems strange that our debate coach, Mr. Earl Planty, should be the envy of Ilion's duplicate addicts.

* * * Whether musical or athletic bars, both kinds appeal to Mr. Frederick Fay Swift, we hear, as he enjoys a little workout now and then in the gym, showing the boys how to do tricks. And we must not forget to mention his propensity for punning. Speaking of the vicious habit, we'd like to suggest Miss Dollar as the faculty member with the most sense. (Need we explain?)

* * * Did you know that Miss Mary Sullivan, while parlez-vousing, some, times sighs and thinks of her old ambition to become "somebody's secretary"?

* * * Have you noticed the worried looks on the faces of Miss Hallenbeck and Mrs. Fagan, our champion tea maker? They have been delving into the mysteries of Chaucer and "Beowolf" in a devastating extension course called English 40.

* * * Another one of our faculty men, bets realized her ambition this past year by earning her AB degree from Albany State. Congratulations, Miss Schwartz!

* * * If you are having hard luck with your plant growing, consult Miss Elizabeth Ward, our horticulturist. She seems to have a charm which soothes the savage root!

* * * We wonder if our dynamic history teacher, Miss Ruth Gordon, is expecting another great flood. At least she's having a fine time playing Mrs. Noah with her collection of lambs, cats, dogs-and what have you.

* * * Often this year we have discovered Mr. George Entwistle behind a huge, dusty volume in the public library. Is he reading up on turkeys so that he can experiment with said birds on his farm this summer?

* * * Sometime when you're blue or discouraged, call on Miss Mabel Briggs in 37. Although she works at school from 7:30 a. m. until late in the afternoon, she always greets you with an inspiring "Cheer Up." We wish we could absorb some of her sympathy and understanding. And if you want advice on how to get students through Regents, consult Mrs. Davies, who has such fine results with physics and chemistry.

* * * Not content with just teaching design (and doing a good job of it, too!) Mrs. Fitzpatrick seems to be running a school bus on the side. Have you noticed her noon-tide brood?

* * * Miss Antoinette Schobel, we find, is a genealogist in her spare time, climbing family trees to her heart's content. And we could mention lots of other things this talented young lady likes to do.

* * * Mrs. Curry, our girls' gym instructor, besides teaching her pupils how to grow muscle, has also started a vogue for square dancing.

* * * Mr. Joseph Roman, our musician with a temperamental curl, rides about in his gray V-8, delivering music wherever he goes.

* * * Someday we may find ourselves paying royalties instead of compliments to Mr. Swarthout. We hear he is not content with freezing the blood in our veins as Dracula, but that he aims to write a Broadway hit.

* * * Not to be outdone by the male enthusiasts of the faculty, Miss Flora Welden is learning to bowl with the girl students' team. Give the weaker sex time, and we'll be challenging that unbeatable men's faculty team, about which we hear so much.

* * * Although she is not exactly a member of the faculty, Mrs. Grimshaw, grand keeper of the archives, is certainly an indispensable person. We appreciate the never failing help she offers us with our trials and tribulations.

* * * Miss Ellen Gorham is the reason why so many little boys are taking such good care of their teeth. She has also proved herself a capable little leading lady in our faculty plays.

* * * Miss Ethel Stevens, our school nurse, is kept very busy with her errands of mercy and her cures for spring fever!

* * * And what write-up of the Ilion High School personnel could be complete without a mention of those two grand people Mr. Rasmussen, "Andy" to us, and Mr. Schneider. Despite oil burners blowing up, and rooms that are too hot or too cold to suit our varying temperatures, they seem to enjoy their jobs. And what a relief it is to be dusted out every night by two such accommodating friends.

* * * Last but not least will we ever forget that smiling person that greets us each "good Friday" morning with a check? Not that we appreciate Miss Bess Jochmus merely because she's our paymaster. We don't know what we'd do without her happy presence at our faculty gatherings.